Howdy! In honor of my gracious host, the lovely MissFourEyes (aka The Naked Blogger), I am indeed blogging naked! Yes, sitting here at my desk naked as the day I was born but somewhat bigger and older and hairier. The subject of today’s post was inspired by MissFourEyes (who was inspired by Twindaddy of Stuphblog (who was inspired by BreezyK of The Camel Life)), and that is to write a F**k It List!
We’ve all heard about the Bucket List, writing a list of things you want to do before you die, but as a student of Stoic Philosophy (and an apprentice of common sense) I know that it’s not really up to me whether or not I get to do everything I’d like to. No matter how hard you try, the completion of a Bucket List requires a big dollop of help from outside events and circumstances!
So in the name of empowering ourselves and focusing on the things we can do, the things that rely only on ourselves, I’m sharing with you my F**k It List, a list of things that I no longer do or give a F**k about! We can’t always choose what we want to happen, but we can certainly choose what we won’t do anymore I now present to you the 7 things I’ve said F**k It to over the past while!
1. What People Think About Me Anymore - I finally did it! I no longer pander to people in order to gain acceptance or love. If you don’t like me as I am that’s cool, there are plenty of other people out there for ya and I’m happy to hang out with myself until people who dig me turn up This was tough too as I’ve always been really insecure with my hair – in high school I once punched a good friend in the face for calling me “Mrs Part” after a nasty new do – but now I say F**k It, it’s my hair and I’ll do what I want
2. Lies - I can’t lie! At least not to people close to me. Like Alex in A Clockwork Orange I feel physically sick when I even think about dishonesty. In my younger days I was a terrible fibber, but one way or another my lies would always be the ruin of me. These days (I think mainly due to practicing an exercise called Focusing by Eugene Gendlin) it’s a very different story, I just can’t do it, and my life has never been happier, simpler and more stress free than now that I’m totally open and honest! Just say no to lies kids!
3. Toxic People - There are two kinds of people, those who give you energy when you are around them, and those who drain your energy. I used to love being “the nice guy”, and this meant (in my mind) giving my time to a whole lot of people who simply sucked me dry (emotionally!). Not anymore, sorry guys but I like positive feedback loops, I like relationships that spiral upward as both people feed each other good energy I don’t think I’m a bad guy, I’m not cruel or indecent to people, but I will avoid those who bring me down. I’ve definitely gotten a little more selfish with my time and energy.
4. Parties or Clubs - The first thing I usually say to someone new is “Hi I’m Rohan, the most boring person you will ever meet”. That’s right, noisy pubs and clubs are like bug spray to me, and the same goes for big parties and social engagements. My idea of a good time (with other people) is a nice cup of tea, a lovely stroll or a sit in a park on a sunny day. I’ve always wondered how people can have a proper conversation over the noise in a bar or club. It’s funny too because I’ve played well over a hundred live gigs. I like being on stage and doing a job, but once the gig’s done, sorry ladies and gents I’m heading home for a nice cup of Barry’s tea to wind down. No after parties for me!
5. The TV/News - I used to keep up with the new, I sure did! I could tell you what was going on all over the place, but it drained me, it made me frustrated, cynical and angry. Those are all great if you’re going to do something about it, a revolutionary should definitely be angry and cynical! But a lazy poet who doesn’t like clubbing? He should be much more chilled out So yeah these days I couldn’t give a damn what’s going on, that circus has been going since Ancient Rome, I’ve unsubscribed from the gloom and misery. Every now and then I check back to see if anything has changed. Nope, same heads talking about the same crap. The only news I keep up with these days is video game news. Who’s ready for the Sony PS4 announcement press event on the 20th?!?!?! Squeeee ^_^
6. Society’s Pressures - Hey you know the way we are all supposed to get a job, get married, have kids, buy a house, send them to college etc? Well I’m kinda playing it by ear. I know there are loads of people who really dig everything I mentioned above, and that’s great! But it’s not for everyone, and yet there is immense pressure from everywhere to fall in line. I used to pretty much see my life going that way, now I’m not sure. I’m just along for the ride. I saw The Big Lebeowski again recently and I really got it this time, I used to think The Dude was a lovable loser, now I see that he is the winner. There’s nothing wrong with kids and houses, as Shakespeare wrote in Hamlet “There is nothing either good or bad, but thinking makes it so”. But those of us who might not be into that should definitely not have to feel guilty about it
7. Music Production - I’ve been producing music, my own and others, for about 8 years. I’m saying F**k It for a while and putting my time into writing, and then live gigging later in the year. I’ve recorded 10 solo albums but now I wanna write 10 books! I love recording but like anything if done long enough it loses it’s luster. Besides the next studio I build I want to be somewhere warm, near a beach, with a pool, yeah that sounds good
And there we have it, my 7 things F**k It List. Remember folks it’s not as much about what you do, as it is about what you choose not to do. We can’t always choose to place ourselves into great situations, but we can often choose to remove ourselves from ones that aren’t helping, or that we aren’t enjoying!
I’d like to say a big thanks again to MissFourEyes (you super star), thanks for having me and for being such a fun blogger. Your posts always bring a smile to my face!
Finally I’d just like to recommend this naked blogging thing, not too bad, kinda liberating. Everyone should give it a try at least once! Just be sure to knock the heating up if you’re in Dublin in the middle of winter!
Want more Rohan? I’d start here: