Have you ever met a person that is so insanely amazing that left you wondering how they do it? This person’s got it all, he’s crazy handsome, sweet, and hilariously funny. For the third time here, ladies and gentlemen, The Hook! Enjoy his post, and don’t forget to check out his blog, You’ve Been Hooked!
TEN THINGS YOU DIDN’T KNOW ABOUT MISS FOUR EYES
1) She has a secret origin. Her mother, Queen Hippolyta, sent her to Man’s World to combat evil… wait, that was Wonder Woman. Never mind.
2) She doesn’t just blog naked. She prays that way, too. It makes her feel clean and dirty simultaneously.
3) She once killed a man. With a pair of glasses, of course.
4) The world of film beckons. Her tree hugging pic (see below), inspired Vivid Video to offer her a contract for a multi-film series tilted Miss Four Eyes Loves Wood.
5) Literal translations are her thing. She thought “tagging” bloggers meant something else entirely – until the authorities got involved.
6) Her parentage is questionable. Her deepest, darkest secret? She is actually the long-rumored missing Kardashian sibling.
7) She’s not cut out for the kitchen. Her first batch of chocolate chip cookies actually came out radioactive. On the plus side, she’s her own nightlight so she can turn the lights out when blogging naked…
8) Her best work has ended up on the cutting room floor. She was originally cast as the fourth witch in Oz the Great and Powerful, but she made the rest of the cast look like hacks. Mila Kunis felt like Lindsay Lohan compared to Miss Four Eyes. And James Franco couldn’t handle another humiliation after sinking the Oscars last year….
9) She’s the best. But you already knew that, didn’t you?
10) CLASSIFIED. I tried to disclose this final piece of information, but guys in dark suits and sunglasses showed up at my house carrying a black bag….
Want more of The Hook? Click here:
- And So It Begins…
- You Know It’s Monday When…: Hook Edition.
- The Academy Awards Broadcast I’d KILL to See…
I can believe it all
I know, right?
Miss Four Eyes rocks!
It would seem so
Course she’s the best, goes without saying
Love #6..LOL Have a wonderful day 
Getting the mats sorted,,Hope your a good seller Heeaawwwaaaw xx00xx
Mollie and Alfie
I’m proud of #6, too! She’s really risen above her station, hasn’t she?
I’m so excited about the mats! Can’t wait to see them!
Yes, she is indeeeeeeed the best!
Wonderful post, again, Hook!
Thanks!
I had great material to work with!
I knew she had some Kardashian in her. She’s only blogging naked so she can see that juicy booty as much as possible.
Good theory!
You caught me
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Miss Four Eyes is a hottie
Seconded!
Hey, Hook, quit doing all of Miss Four Eyes’ work and come do mine. My brain is swiss cheese at this point. And yes, all 10 of those are totally correct. That tree pick makes Sad Pony and Squirrel swoon. Squirrel is planning on moving into that tree.
Why isn’t he planning to move into my bedroom?
You mean you don’t have a tree house?
Did you know that you can’t fit a bed in a tree house? We tried, not getting the bed in there, but just, you know, without the bed…..didn’t work out so well
Because that’s MY next move.
Woohoo!!!!!!!!!!!
I know!
#4 is a total ripoff of that scene from Evil Dead.
Dude! Watching that scene is one of those moments that makes you want to jump out of your own skin!
And no, Miss Four Eyes is not in the remake…
You are a Wonder of Wonders, Miss For Eyes!
She is indeed.
Aw thanks! But Hook is the amazing one. I think I shall call him The Amazing Hook from now on
It has a certain ring to it…
Thanks!
Like a superhero. You should have a cape!
It would probably get tangled up in my cart or some luggage!
Shoot.
A laser gun then. Or telekinesis!
Telekinesis would be invaluable!
I think #1 is really true and Miss Four Eyes’ secret identity is Wonder Woman. Like an opposite Clark Kent.
Good guess!
Love that! I put ON the glasses when I’m undercover
Exactly. Then you go back to your plain old boring day job as Wonder Woman.
Sigh, it can be so stressful
Kissing inanimate objects is a clear indicator of coolness. The end.
There you have it, folks, the final word from an expert!
The more you think you know the more you want to know. You are so very funny. I loved all ten and there were ten so that was good. I am not sure how I can quantify which one I liked best the tree hugger is funny, kissing a tree? Are you sure kids didn’t have nicknames for you?
Praying naked and feeling clean and dirty at the same time is hilarious. You do a lot of things without clothes. I am way too self conscious for that, I even have time showering naked, http://youtu.be/gBT7uzr4bGI , watch video for demonstration. I am now pretending to work while writing this, so I must do some actual work and hope that the humor and wonderful thought behind this post is enough to get me through the next 45 minutes. 
Thanks for the fun BBQ!
You’re quite welcome!
Haha! Shower shorts: for the man who has nothing to hide, but still wants to! Perfect, like a superhero!
The Hook will get you through anything
The Hook is funny! So are you!
Thanks, Jon, you’re the best
Impossible because you are the best, but I will take second!
Oh Hook – you’re in another place… does your wife know?
Shh…
Do you hug trees while naked? That might be dangerous
You’re right, it is. Don’t ask.
How did you get away from the men in the suits?
Miss Four Eyes has mad evasion skills!
Are the glasses really just a disguise?
Who can say?
Well, I guess she could, but then that might, or might not, blow her cover. It’s a mystery!
Shhh…
Sorry!! Oh my gosh, I’ll keep my mouth shut from now on.
Move along, nothing to see here… These are not the disguising glasses you are looking for.
You think you virtually know a person…
Our host is full of surprises…
all this back and forth guest posting is making me dizzy. wait…I’m not dizzy….yes I am….think I’ll go away now. (nice post though and now I”m jealous)
Get some rest, cutie!
Miss Four Eyes is the best and I still swear she works at my local Whole Foods in the Deli. If not, the poor girl I stare down every week probably thinks I’m a looney tune. I love that she was able to take someone down with her glasses without damaging them…good girl!
She rocks, doesn’t she?
Hehe, this Whole Foods girl, I want to see her!
I think I might start a whole new type of martial arts, self defense with glasses! Who needs a gun when you’ve got glasses?
You could utilize the power of the sun and turn your specs into lasers!
Rohan, you are simply brilliant!
So good to confirm these things I already suspected. Like the Kardashian thing…
Glad I could clear that up for you, Carrie!
Your awesomeness just blinded me into mute submission.
Also, I like what you’re wearing. I know you’re a Kardashian and born with it (and hair?) but just saying. Just like that. Can’t think of much else.
Haha, RItika! You’re awesome
Why did you kill someone? I want details.
He ate all the cookies! He had it coming
I vote you not guilty, then.
Number 4 is definitely my favorite because it gave me an excuse to see Miss Four Eyes’ iconic tree picture again and to save it to my computer for when I need a smile (yes a smile, why, what were you thinking of?).
And I simply can’t resist a good wood joke!
Mr Hook, you should definitely be the one to write her authorized biography.
Love yas both, many radioactive nudie hugs
Rohan.
I like the way you think, Rohan.
Number 4 is my favorite too! Wood jokes are insanely funny to me.
You saved it on your computer! Hehe
Lots and lots of nudie hugs, Rohan!
(you too, Hook)
Did you go to Kim’s wedding?
What about the divorce ceremony?
The divorce ceremony was so much better than the wedding. Like if the wedding were Godzilla, the divorce ceremony would be Godzilla’s mommy!
just like Kim’s ass or is the other sister the one with the big ass?
Ha! I must measure them both next time
Sounds like a winner to me!
The Hook? Oh yes! Absolutely!
Both of you!
We both thank you!
Glasses, huh? I can believe it. Those things can be deadly.
They sure can! Rohan even suggested that we could use the power of the sun and turn them into lasers!
I wish my glasses had lasers. Would come in handy.
# 2 was our fav, clean and dirty at the same time
Also # 4 why weren’t you hugging that tree naked ?? Trees need some loving too !
I’m not nearly brave enough for naked tree hugging yet…someday
Do we need to send you pics showing you how it’s done ??
Haha, no that’s fine
Laughing, glad you……uh “saw” the humor in it !
Imagine if I’d said yes! Haha!
LOL !! Well, I guess your day would turn to one of shock or surprise when I sent them to you. We would hope though they would just make you and the other bloggers smile and be jealous. Love your blog and your fiesty personality. Sad more people in this world can’t have fun with such fun subjects and realize letting down their inhibitions opens the door to many new pleasures in life.
Thank you so much, that’s very sweet
there’s prolly truth in all of this haha ^^ specially the praying thing. lol ^^ great post
The Hook would never lie! Especially about the praying thing
haha nudity and prayer just reminds me of an embarrassing incident with my grandma when i was like 14 lol lol really had fun reading about you.
What did it it remind you of exactly? You can’t leave me hanging here!
once when i was 14, i stayed at my uncle’s in San Fran. my grandma was there too. i sleep in the nude and it was early in the morning when she went in my room to pray the rosary, i think she likes it there cos the window gives her a view of the trees blah blah.. half-awake, i stirred, then felt the heavy blanket fall off.. so of course, my grandma got to see my whole business. “Santísima Trinidad!,” i heard her gasp. lol i just kind of pretended to be asleep cos i didnt know what to do hahaha then i felt her approach me and cover me up with the blanket. lol
Haha! The fact that you sleep in the nude deserves a high five
*high five*
*high five*
LOL
I thought we all slept nude ..LOL
hahaha my grandma doesn’t, for sure. lol
We hope that was a liberating moment for you. We have experienced simular events too.
haha it was pretty embarrassing for a 14 year old then lol rock on ^^
True enough, at 14 with all the puberty things firing up it can be a very uneasy time indeed. Hopefully now that your older you have had some experiences that were more stimulating. We have been caught by house guests on several occasions, always makes for some nice open conversation.
So you put a man down with your glasses. I hope the glasses are ok.
Surprisingly, they’re ok!
Yep we’re real push overs, especially when nude !!..:-)
Haha! *high five*
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‘She doesn’t just blog naked. She prays that way, too. It makes her feel clean and dirty simultaneously.’ – hahaha what a brilliant phrase!
Missy, you sound even more interesting than before
Haha, thanks, Pixie Girl!
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