Life and Other Funny Things

Stay away from me, I’m bad luck

I think I may be bad luck.

My friend Sheri and I were driving to a party and she got flashed by a guy on the street. Yes, she got flashed by a complete stranger. In the guy’s defense, he was homeless and only had the one cloth to cover him with. He had to adjust it to be more comfortable. Obviously, the only way he could do that was to open it up entirely, subjecting Sheri to his junk.

The most unfortunate part isn’t that she was subjected to looking at that man’s junk, but that it was her first time looking at anyone’s junk. Yeah, that’s gotta suck. It was my fault, I was pointing at something behind the man, so she had to look.

When I really start to think about it, this isn’t the first time something weird has happened to her when I’m around. Or rather, the only time bad things happen to her is when she’s with me.

Once back in school, she touched a guy’s hickey (the guy was not her boyfriend, and she did not give him that hickey). And it was completely my fault (as usual); she didn’t even know it was a hickey until after I told her.

Another time, she had water spit on her. Let’s just say, me, Sheri, and a mouthful of water is not a good combination. In the end, the water will, invariably, end up on Sheri.

I think for her own good and for the sake of our friendship I may need to stay away from her.

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