Life and Other Funny Things

Things that happen when you move off your parents’ couch

I moved out of my parents place last year. It wasn’t so bad. I was in some nice (read: so gross I don’t even know what clean is anymore) dorms and made loads of friends (read: people who kept me up at ungodly hours calling it a partaaaayyyy)

The dorm kicked us out a couple of months ago when all our classes got over, so now I’m really on my own. I live in a small apartment that has one, ONE, bathroom with 4 other people. It’s not so bad, except I want to burst out into tears every time I want to pee. But more on that later.

Things that happen when you start living on your own:

  • Your living standards drop like crazy. I sleep on a single person mattress. Notice how I said mattress? There’s no bed, the floor holds it up.
  • You get poor, like really really poor. These days, I don’t even know if I can afford McDonald’s towards the end of the month.
  • You start to realize how privileged you were with your parents. Mom ALWAYS stocked up on toilet paper. Not once did I have to think of creative ways of wiping my ass without toilet paper.
  • You start getting excited about the little things in life. Just yesterday, my roommate and I got so psyched about buying 10 dishwashing sponges for a dollar. TEN!
  • Your definition of ‘nice things’ will change drastically. Got something from the flea market without stains OR holes?! Score! Macklemore had it right the whole time.
  • You will define cleanliness on a scale. On a scale of So-Clean-You-Can-Lick-It to College-Dorm-Bathroom, I’d say my apartment is a clean level of your average women’s handbag. It’s clean enough that you’re not afraid of touching anything, but every now and then you’ll find something that’ll make you say “Huh. How’d that get there?”

Clean scale

  • You will feel pride at the oddest things. It’s official you guys. As of today, I am a proud owner of 30 rolls of toilet paper.

Adult life? Loving it.

What about you guys, what’s the most radical change you noticed after you moved out of your parents’ place?

29 thoughts on “Things that happen when you move off your parents’ couch

    • Haha! That is so true! I found a way around the dishes problem. I only have one of each type of utensil. Like one spoon, one fork, one bowl, and a single plate. That right there is pretty much my whole kitchen for you

        • I was actually considering that. I was going to revolutionize modern kitchens, no dirty dishes ever! But then I realized I’m so unemployed that I can’t afford that many paper plates. It really puts your life in perspective when your ultimate goal is to make enough in life that you can buy paper plates.

  1. I was already moved out from home by the time I graduated from college some 20+ years ago. I was sharing a house with three friends, and the only timed we cleaned the house was when we were throwing a party. And after the party, the house was a much bigger mess than it was before we cleaned it. Fun times, but I never want to live with other people ever again.

  2. You do indeed learn to live without a lot when you first get out on your own. When I moved out, I didn’t have Dollar Stores etc to find my bargains. But I somehow made it work without living on the street or on a friend’s couch. And I got married at 22 so it wasn’t for long. It sounds like you are doing just fine and it won’t be forever, I promise! 🙂

    • No Dollar Stores?! What is that like?
      You know my life is sad when I freak out about not having any dollar stores around. 😛
      It’s not so bad really, makes for great blog material at least 😀

  3. Thanks for the smiles and the education. I thought only single men lived like that. Thanks for the enlightenment (not the 18th century European enlightenment, you probably had nothing to do with that).

    • You know what though? I’ve had girl roommates, and now I have guy roommates. I can now say, after having first hand experience, single women are much worse than single men. No really, the guys are so clean and tidy. My girlfriends and I live like we’re in a dump 😛

        • Haha! Perhaps, you’re right. But they’re most definitely not trying to impress me (at one point my roommate is like “Wait. What? You’re a girl?!”), but all those other women out there. They do have a lot more at stake if they bring a girl home and she walks into a dump yard.

  4. It’s been a while since I moved away from the parentage, but I think the biggest change for me was the refrigerator. For the first few months of my new apartment life, there was rarely much more than a case of cola and a bottle of mustard in there. It took me ages to learn to cook stuff!

    • I still can’t cook! I barely manage to keep a carton of orange juice in my fridge. And even then, you just never know when it has a slight kick to it.
      Out of beer? There’s always orange juice in the fridge!

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